Last night my son fell asleep in his car seat on the way home from dinner. When we arrived home, he woke up very cranky. Eventually this turned into an all out screaming fit. He cried for a half hour reminding me of a colicky newborn. I felt that panic we all feel when something is wrong with our child and we cannot help them. I tried holding him, giving him his vitamin (which he loves), laying down with him, ignoring him, playing with him, letting him watch tv and loving on him all to no avail. All I successfully managed to do was overwhelm him with options.
My mom sent me a text asking how we were doing at which I responded with what was going on. She responded with a text that read "he loves twinkle twinkle little star!" Knowing that singing isn't my strong suite, but grasping at straws nonetheless I began singing to my baby boy. He immediately stopped and looked at me with deep intensity in his eyes. I continued singing any song I could think of ranging from Barney to simply talking to him in song. He reached out, touched my face and grinned ever so slightly.
I had an overwhelming thankfulness for my mom in that moment. I wonder if he was having the same feeling overcome him.
Sometimes I have to remind myself to take a step back in my moments when I feel out of control. Babies are not rocket science. We live in such a fast paced world; it's too easy to get used to other things entertaining our children for us. All they need from us is motherhood in it's simplest and most raw form. Vulnerable, joyful, singing, thankful, loving, compassionate and graceful motherhood. Thank you, Lord, for that wonderful reminder last night and for the blessing of such a wonderful mom and son.
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