On the 25th of August, I found out that you had been selected from over 500 entries to participate in the photo shoot in Manhattan. I'm proud of you little guy.
This whole thing really got me thinking. My baby isn't even two yet and the world is already wanting him. They're clawing at him already. Okay, that's dramatic. I did enter him into this contest. BUT it won't be long before the world is clawing at him.
I am finding that I cannot pray enough lately. Raising kids in this world would be terrifying if I didn't know better. What I mean is I know that I have to let go and trust God to protect him despite my own fears.
It is my basic motherly instinct to want to helicopter parent that baby o' mine. I want to hover all over that child and keep him at an arms length. I want to be close enough to catch him before he falls. I want to wipe the tears away before they hit the floor. I want to smack away all the bad guys before they even set eyes on him. I want to build fences around his heart and lock it up.
However I know that doing so would be doing him a disservice. I have to let him be a little boy. He needs the freedom to run free and explore. He needs to feel like he is capable of doing things by himself and for himself. He has to make his own mistakes and learn from them. I have to give him the freedom to not be a .... (sniffle) baby anymore.
I pray that God sends positive people into this child's life who will guide him, better him and bring him joy. I pray that God will use him to do the same to others and be a shining light for Him.
I need my village to pray for me as I have been particularly emotional lately. I am so thankful to have the gift of such a precious child to parent. I am overwhelmed with emotion at the fact that my son, although he will forever remain my baby, is leaving the treasured years of infancy behind and we are moving onto a new phase in our lives.
The fact that we can sit and have full conversations now or that he can run and play at the park completely unassisted is so much. Just so much. It's the best thing ever, but it's a lot. It's so much that it's messing up my grammar and my sentences aren't even complete right now. I think I'm just confused because everyone says that time flies and I'm looking back and I know that I cherished every second but I feel like there is so much time unaccounted for. The first year flew by, the second year was the speed of light, if the third year goes by any faster than that he's going to be grown by next week. I just can't.
BAM
“Be still, and know that I am God."
Psalm 46:10
Wow! Cool how God does that. Seriously, like mid panic attack here and he just threw that verse at me. I probably would've edited my little blog freak out up there to make it not so random and all over the place, but I think in this case it really shows what God did with me there. There were multiple other things going on in my mind that weren't being typed out in this blog that He handled with this verse as well. On that note, I'm done here. I have some thanking to do.
