Slow to Speak

My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry. James 1:19

Quick to listen: check!

Slow to become angry: check!

Slow to speak: ... In progress

Recently it has come to my attention that I need serious work in this area. 

A few weeks ago I was actually searching to find ammo against my husband on an issue. We disagreed about something and I was mad. I needed to prove him wrong. I wanted to be fully prepared to explain to him why his view wasn't Biblical and why I was right. 

Yes, I am stubborn. Yes, my daddy will tell anybody that I should have been a lawyer. I fight for what I believe in and want especially if I am passionate about something. If I want it bad enough, I work my butt and my brains off to make it happen one way or another, no matter what.

However, in this particular instance I was quickly humbled. In my searching to prove my point, God actually revealed something to me. Something that should already be intertwined into my being. 

Sometimes silence proves a point. At times, the best thing to do is stop speaking, be silent and trust the Lord to speak for you. Friends, I stopped searching for my ammo right then and there and I started praying. That's what I should have been doing all along. Almost instantly came the peace. 

...and I'll have you know that my husband did eventually come around on that disagreement. 

I'm turning a new leaf. The past few weeks I have been working hard on staying silent unless I have something productive to say. It's taking prayer and it will continue to take time, but I'm making progress day by day. As a result, my relationships are more peaceful. My life has been so much less stressful. I've had the freedom to mind only my own business which when I really start analyzing doesn't consist of much. No more attempting to control, manipulate or persuade. God's got this!

Spaghetti Brains

I once heard that women's brains are like spaghetti and men's brains are like waffles. Women tend to let every aspect of their thoughts run together while men compartmentalize and focus on one task at a time. Nothing brought this to light for me quite like becoming a mother has.

Recently my husband and I were loading up his bike and Grayson's bike trailer in the truck so they could go ride. There was an oil spill in our driveway that Jason had recently poured clean cat litter on in an attempt to soak the oil up. I had been keeping an eye on Grayson kicking around in the cat litter for about ten minutes when Jason noticed and told him stop. The conversation went something like this:

Jason: "Grayson get out of the cat litter you're going to get oil all over your shoes!"

Me: "He's been having a blast for ten minutes. Those are his play shoes anyway, but I checked to make sure the oil wasn't getting on them when he first started."

Jason: "How could you have done that? You were helping me load this trailer..."

Me: "Multitasking. I also pulled him out of the front seat of your truck. I took the bug spray out of his hands and put it up so he wouldn't play with it. I swatted a mosquito on his leg."

The list of physical things I had done in that ten minute period could have gone on for a while, but I stopped there. The list of mental thoughts I was having could have gone on for days. I was preparing in my mind what I would pack in his backpack to take to the trails. I was thinking about his snacks and the fact that he would need his water bottle that keeps liquids cold for hours because it was so hot. I noticed his cheeks were turning redder than they typically do in the heat and hoped that it was simply his 2 year molars causing the redness and not illness. I thought about the fact that it was a Saturday afternoon so we couldn't go to the doctor even if he did start running a fever. (Luckily it was only his molars.) I remembered that I needed to put the extra car seat back in his daddy's truck. He would need his blanket since after the ride he would be ready for his nap. I wondered how Jason was going to get his bike and trailer loaded back up on his own. (It was a tight squeeze and we all know women are better at fitting the entire sink into the dishwasher.) I was also planning what I was going to do during the hour that they would be riding. We all know the options are endless when you have an hour or two of free time. My wondering mind went on and on and on...

Here's my point: Women's brains don't stop. We are like the energizer bunny on his 6th cup of coffee. This post goes out to hopeful moms, expecting moms, stay at home moms, work at home moms, moms who work outside of the home and empty nesters. When it comes to our children, we are always trying to stay one step ahead. The world doesn't give us time to take a mental break. Once we make that decision to become a mother, our brains take on a whole knew perspective. Our days are no longer only about us, but about this extension of ourselves, our children. We are blessed to have a "spaghetti brain." How else could we keep up?

I see my husband watching TV, playing his xbox or loading up that trailer. I can't help but wonder what is going through his mind. I assume he is most likely fully focused on the task at hand.

So, men... this isn't a post to point out your weakness as I don't believe it is one. We know you do a lot and we appreciate that, truly. You have your own unique strengths. If your brains worked like ours we would live in an even more stressful world. We need people who compartmentalize. You are needed.

Mamas, this is a post to encourage you. Sometimes it is exhausting for our brains to have a seemingly faulty "off switch." We are made differently. To be a mother is a beautiful thing that we are honored to have the privilege. Having the ability to multitask enables us to be better moms for our children and better supporters of each other. God made us this way so that we may care for our children and our households the way that He intended.

Graysonology

"Oh mo!" You're almost two Little Man. You radiate sunshine and joy from the moment you wake me up with morning snuggles and kisses, until the moment you grab my hand and say "my bed" at night. My life is so full when you're around. You are entertainment every second of everyday.

Life with you goes a little something like this...

Dada brings you downstairs in the morning to snuggle with me before he leaves for work. Most of the time you grab my hand to hold and fall back asleep snuggled up against me. Sometimes you are awake for the day so we turn on one of your favorite movies and snuggle. Right now, your favorite is Finding Nemo. You love the part where the fish are chanting for Nemo to join their club. You chant right along and then finish off by exclaiming "SHARK BAIT!" It's adorable. At some point during our morning snuggle time, you decide you are ready to embrace the day. Usually you grab my hand and state "dI want dowwnnnn."

Most of the time we go straight to the potty or the refrigerator. You are halfway potty trained. You will tee-tee on the potty all day long, however you will only go standing up. You are completely opposed to sitting down on a toilet. I'm not sure how we are going to master #2.

Usually when we get to the fridge you tell me "I want a woohoo (Yoohoo drink)" It's the most adorable thing because the pitch in your voice becomes really high when you say "woohoo." Usually for breakfast you ask for sausage, "teese (cheese stick)", yogurt, or "that" while pointing at something totally random.

Lately, we have been going outside or to the park to play after breakfast. Some days, I run errands instead and you don't seem to mind either way. Usually after morning play or errand time you are ready for your nap. You are a NAPPER. You usually sleep at least 2 hours and most of the time 3.

After your nap we usually learn something together or work on a craft. Lately we have been working on colors. You are so into painting, coloring and drawing right now. I can already tell you have a passion for learning. You pick instructions up very quickly, even though you usually test your limits with me.

Normally Dada comes home shortly thereafter. We either cook dinner while you continue your artwork and learning or we pack up and go to dinner.

After dinner we play, talk and catch up with Dada. Usually you don't want much to do with Mama once Dada gets off of work. You want to soak in as much Dada time as you possibly can while hes home. I usually give you two time to play and catch up and I work on house chores or do something for myself during this time. Usually it's something about as simple as taking a shower.

This brings us to your BATH TIME! I'm pretty sure this is your absolute favorite time of the day. You literally spend at least an hour in the bath every night. Your water usually gets cold so I have to drain it and start over. You have even taken an interest in bathing yourself so I give you soap and let you do it first before I make sure you're completely spot free. Thanks to my good friend Mr. Magic Eraser, bath time is your time to get messy. I let you go to town on the bathtub. We have bath crayons, bath markers, bath paints, bath drops, kiddy shaving cream and your shower doors close completely so I even let you splash away. I have found some things are simply not worth stressing over. (Sidenote: I apologize if my child takes a bath at your house and splashes everywhere.) We do bath time big and fun around here.

I really wish I could put your adorableness into words. The words to describe you literally do not exist. Your personality teaches me something new daily. You make me strive to be a better person.

For example, the other day we were in the car. Another driver did something completely wrong and I had to slam on my breaks. They then proceeded to blame me when it was clearly their fault. I was furious initially, then you hollered "UH OH" at the perfect time and I couldn't help but laugh. It was hysterical.

It's times like these that it occurs to me how big you are now. It's a fact that you understand most of what is going on in the world around you. I am so glad that I have God to help me on this parenting journey because it would be extremely intimidating if I didn't. 

You have reached the stage where you can repeat pretty much any phrase. The words you most commonly use without any provoking are:

"Oh mo (no)"
"EWWWW"
"A bug" (stomps on said bug)
"All gone" (while throwing your hands up)
"BYEBYE" (very loudly)
"Hi bish n fog (fish and frog)" (approaching your aquarium pets)
"BYE bish (fish)" (EVERY night before bed)
"Nuggle (snuggle)" (while bringing me your blanket and reaching up)
"Bad bad" (acknowledging you are in trouble)
"Shhhhhh" (With finger over your lips and usually directed at barking dogs)
"hungry" 

"Smells good!" (You sniff everything)

"BOW (WHOA)" Anytime you trip or feel unstable you say this.
"thirsty"
"I want -------- (insert random word here)"
"poopoo"
"teetee"
"I want candy" (after going on the potty)

"I wanna be baybeh!" (Pretending to be a newborn swaddled up in your towel after your bath)

More fun facts:

You hop when you get excited. If you bring me something you want and I say okay, you hop. When I show you something new, you hop. I can always tell when I have received cool mom points because you hop.

You are the door patrol. If a door is open, it must be closed immediately. If there is a button on that doorknob it must be pressed. Lucky for me our interior doors are easy to unlock.

You are super messy but you love cleaning up after yourself. I have decided that you intentionally make messes specifically so that you can help clean them up.

You are a climber. If I look away from you for a split second, you're on top of something. I really don't even worry about it that much anymore. I stay ahead of you and keep dangers out of your reach and locked up.

Most of the time when you climb it is because you want to wash your hands, so I had to teach you how to control the faucets and water temperature so that you wouldn't scald yourself.

You are the cleanest kid I've ever known. You hate having dirty hands and you say "ewww" when you see mud or poop. You like playing in dirt though, so we are okay. You're obsessed with brushing your teeth, washing your hands, taking baths and wiping up messes.

You love gum. You ask for gum at least 30 times per day. It's becoming a problem. Lately your worst fits are caused by me refusing to give you a piece. 

You can now go up and down the stairs independently. I still follow directly behind or in front of you because the thought of you falling terrifies me. 

You give the best kisses ever, hands down!